[RedM]: Outlaw's Atonement - 2
Saved You
The man who killed the devil Was one named Deputy Tucker. He’d been the last badge standing When the bullet had struck her. With my captor dead and my debt forgiven I ran until I was sore and sick. But despite my efforts to stay away I couldn’t make it stick. I hated the gang’s hand on my life Hated what they'd made me do But the world was wide and dangerous Who else did I have to turn to? At the time my thoughts were muddied By guilt that soaked me through. Though I hadn’t shot, my hands felt bloodied– I didn’t know what to do. I’d ran before the fight began Left her and the others on their violent spree Tucker was the only one up when he shot her Which meant she was dead Because of me. With shuddering conviction I set out to make things right. I threatened him in telegrams Counting down the days and nights. One day, I asked him to meet. Whether I shot him or he shot me It didn’t matter in the end. Gun in hand, I had no plan Other than to draw blood Or bleed. But despite all that That’s not what happened. I came to the meeting shameful And saddened. I met him in a clearing Beneath a towering oak. A breeze blew through Its many leaves And shudderingly, I spoke: "Up until yesterday," I told him. “I wanted to shoot you dead." He seemed surprised at this And slowly shook his head. "You were angry, I know, Angry and sad– But you never would've hurt me," He said. "Not like that." I’d bristled for a moment Face etched with a frown How could he be sure I wouldn’t try to take him down? He didn’t know me that way, I’d thought to myself at first. Who was he to say If I’d do my worst? I’d only seen him A handful of times And yet all the same… He’d been there the day I’d first tried to run away And leave the life of crime behind. Ashamed, I hung my head Wanting him to be wrong Wanting to be what my people needed-- Someone ruthless and strong. But I knew deep in my heart If I hurt him that day it would start A cycle I couldn't stop– Where blood would pay for blood Until graves lined the hilltop. He hadn’t meant to take her life, Hadn’t meant to kill her I saw in his eyes that he was like me: This man wasn’t a killer. So we stood beneath the oak And drew no blood from either side. “You can’t get me out,” I told him. “People have already tried.” “The devil got what was coming to her Got what she deserved– But I was never going to leave anyway,” I said. “It was never going to work." He paused, regarding me sincerely And spoke his words soft, And clearly: "Maybe now," he said, "But I think That's not true. If someone had tried harder in the beginning, ...I think we could've saved you." His words lingered in the air. And I could only stare My eyes wide not knowing what to say. These folks were my family now though, And he said that was okay He was glad I’d found my people And soon we parted ways. But nights when things were quiet I’d hum a solemn song Haunted by the life I could’ve had Out there all along.